The upside of intergenerational trauma

Two updates! ONE: I have an exciting update to share with you all next week! Things may look a bit different around here but that’s because I am working hard behind the scenes to provide you with MORE. More community member stories, more community connection, and more resources! Stay tuned.

TWO: Our next paid subscribers community event on Zoom is THIS Sunday, August 27, at 1pm ET. Details for joining are at the end of this post.

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Over the last few weeks, we’ve been discussing how trauma is passed down form generation to generation — in obvious and in subconscious ways. Trauma isn’t the only thing that is passed down. So many of us have inherited our parents fears, and for children of immigrants a lot of those fears may revolve around money, economic and job security, scarcity mindset, and even a general fear-based mindset.

Reflect and comment: What fears have you inherited from your parents or grandparents?

I know that this has been a very heavy month, and that a lot of this has been super depressing to read and talk about! So here are two upsides to intergenerational trauma:

ONE: Remember: The trauma, and subsequent thoughts, behaviors, and coping skills we inherit from our parents are not permanent. We can learn to change or shift the ways we exist in the world, and that can lead to breaking generational cycles and healing. Here are 5 specific ways to help you break generational cycles:

• Learn and trace your family’s history, or learn about the general history of your people

• Avoid secret keeping about your family or yourself (in safe relationships) to help you process and unburden yourself of these secrets. Secrets are central to intergenerational trauma as it can be difficult to heal from what we are unwilling to admit, face, or confront.

• Consider the reactions you have on a daily basis for a week. Do they feel in line with the experience or do they feel to be more extreme. Sit with this to help you identify the themes and triggers you struggle with.