You may value family, but what beliefs are tied to that?

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I have been thinking a lot about values. Often, values — or a misalignment in values — is the biggest threat to peace in a relationship. Think about it. Who do you really align with in your values? You don’t have to have perfect alignment to have a good relationship, but it certainly adds complexity when you don’t.

Often, in my work with clients, I will do an exercise (I share one for paid subscribers at the end of this post) to help them really reflect and see who in their life values what… and how these values differ, compare, or overlap with the values they currently live by or want to live by.

I write about this in chapter 6— here’s a preview: Values-driven choices can be hard because they require understanding how your own values may overlap with or differ from those of the people you love. They also require getting clear, for yourself, on how living out your values may change certain relationships, and whether you are okay with that. These moments of self-discovery can be overwhelming, but be patient with yourself; change doesn’t happen overnight.

Here’s the catch though: It’s not just about values. It’s about beliefs, too.

Keep reading to learn about the difference between beliefs and values and to get an exercise to excavate your values