February 2024 Recommendations and Resources
I can’t believe my book comes out in two months! If you want to guarantee yourself a signed preorder copy, please order from Yu and Me books directly with this link: https://www.yuandmebooks.com/preorder/p/but-what-will-people-say-signed
I had a client tell me about this idea for a bingo card versus resolutions, and I really loved it. I am going to make one (it’s never too late to plan for the year). Instead of weighing yourself down with a long laundry list of things you expect yourself to do or achieve or ”be” this year, make a bingo card and see if you can get five in a row!
I love this personal essay on how this Asian American became “friends” with their immigrant parents. I found this HuffPost article on the most common things that Gen Z brings up in therapy illuminating. I also really appreciated this candid read on R.O Kwon’s book and how — and why — she hopes her parents never rad it. And here’s an interesting exploration of what rest means and how you can explore that for yourself.
I have had some really great conversations for my mini But What Will People Say? podcast over on Instagram. I talked to author and astrophysicist Sarafina El-Badry Nance about estrangement from a parent, the mind-body connection, and on taking care during incredibly painful times. I talked to author and DEI educator Michelle Kim on the history of the model minority myth and how it is hurting us and others, especially now with what’s happening in Gaza. We also talk about intersectional allyship, what real community looks like, how and why others’ silence can feel so activating, and I get vulnerable and honest about doing this work imperfectly but truthfully. And today, I had a great conversation with Dr. Varua Srinivasan, sexual health educator, on sex, sexual health, sexuality, and all the stereotypes and cultural norms and beliefs around this topic! There’s a part one and a part two because we got cut off!
Finally, I love Layla Saad’s breakdown of what it means to be Good Ancestor:
I read a few great books this month, including First Lie Wins (such a fun thriller!), A Love Song for Ricki Wilde (a cute romance with magical realism) and The Night of The Storm (a fast-paced locked room murder, Indian family style!).
Don’t forget we’ll be reading The Arsonist’s City by Hala Alyan for Diaspora Reads Book Club next month!
See you next week or maybe I’ll see you at the March for Palestine this weekend?
Best,
Sahaj
I connected more with my dad when he shared the Cheng kinship book with me. It's an abridged version and a photocopy of the real thing, which details several generations of Chengs (men, of course). I knew that many of my ancestors worked for the imperial government, which meant that they had to pass exams. And this means my family is a family of scholars. One guy even represented China in several countries, travelling to Japan, the United States and Peru over a course of several years. I suppose he was a diplomat? And going to that many places in the 19th century was such a privilege and likely really strenuous (whereas today, he'd just hop on a plane and get there in less than a day)! I just wished I was able to learn more about the women, but, of course, there's very little information. I'm actually not even sure where to start! I know both my grandmothers' family names but I only know ONE great-grandmother's (my paternal grandfather's mom). I don't know my paternal grandmother's mother's name because my dad doesn't know. I don't even think he ever met her - communism closed the border between Hong Kong (then a British colony) and the mainland, where my grandmother was from. My grandfather was at least a second generation Hong Konger. I probably SHOULD know my maternal grandmother's mom's family name, but I never asked. And I probably should ask my mom. She should also know my other maternal great-grandmother's family name too. I really want to piece things together, but it can be tough when records are destroyed due to revolutions and crazy government schemes (the Cultural Revolution was the BIGGEST Cancel Culture Campaign in the last 60-70 years).